How do you rebuild trust with your little when you break it? Conversely, how can a little re-embrace their littleness when trust is broken?
I’ve been here before, to some extent. People are human; we all make mistakes, even to the point where you ask yourself “what the hell was my mindset” or “what the hell was I thinking?”
As you can imagine, I get ‘hit on’ here on Tumblr every single day. 99 out of 100 times I say “thanks for the compliment. I hope you keep following.” But that 1 time, even though it was months ago, still haunts me and hurts, even though it was just some dumb Tumblr flirting. For a long time a long time ago, that was part of the Tumblr experience for me when I first found this place.
Looking back, it hurts for a lot of reasons, but the one that took time for me personally was the self-reflection I had to do. I am in love with her and was then too; why would I entertain some flirt? It was unclear to me then but there was a lot going on at the time. I felt like I neglected the readers and need to engage them like I had in the past. I felt like I was losing her a little bit. But above all, I had to realize something about myself: that I was a whore for attention. It made me sick to my stomach to see that in myself.
We all grow from our mistakes – if you truly love someone, you’d move mountains to make sure they understood the depths of that love. That is exaaactly what I did. Never again did she question how I felt about her or if I’d be loyal to her. Never again did she wonder where my heart was. It was with her. We grew from it and developed one of the most amazing bonds out of that and other tensions. We became closer.
I think it’s as simple as that – he gains your trust by being sincerely regretful and assuring you what you do mean to him, then assuring you that his mistake is never happening again.
Now if his “mistake” was fucking another woman or maintaining a relationship with her, then you really have something bigger to work through, but it’s not impossible. It’s just a lot harder to believe it was a “mistake” and not something that will not happen again, and his sincerity is immediately suspect.
Your other question is more simple: how can you embrace being a Little again? Answer: it’s who you are. It’s a part of you. You won’t be happy in another relationship unless you are a Little again. He doesn’t own this part of you. You do. He was gifted the responsibility to tend to it by you, but that’s it. If he cannot embrace it and care for it, in time somebody else will.
Hope that helps.