I absolutely love your blog and the name. I have dreams of being a dominatrix and have finally found a sub. But I'm a novice at this. And have only ever dominated my ex fiance but that was brand new to sex. I am so excited but also nervous I want to be a great domme I was wondering if you have any helpful tricks or tips to a beginner?
My biggest tip for being a Domme (or a Dom), which means you should be attentive to the role and responsibility that you assume, is to take it slow as you learn and reach out to people with a good head on their shoulders. There are a lot of D/s Doms/Dommes that would classify themselves as sadists – I am not one of those people – to me I only gain pleasure from her pain if she ultimately wants it and gains something out of it. I do not want to classify a group as being bad, but I do think you do need to be wary of seeking advice from people who classify as sadists, although not always. Words are words and you can be a loving sadist – but I do know there is a group of people who use it as a cloak to exert abuse.
I recommend reading The Loving Dominant by John Warren. I think you will learn a lot.
Take your time – learn before you act – you are dealing with a person’s most vulnerable state. You should be responsible with it.