To the astute reader of the ole Blog-A-Roni, you might surmise that the author is a bit of a dick. So be it.
Truth be told: I’m just a cynic. A romantic too so I’m not all sour grapes.
Best described as a logical-minded man who loves the feeling of love, values romance, knows the magic of getting to know someone, and really relishes the maturity of a bond as it matures into a deep Love. But I call em like I see it, and unfortunately sometimes “it”, is just an unpolished turd.
You see my cynicism recently is getting the better of me each time I read some Tumblr blog or FetLife crap highlighting the ridiculous garbage from the BDSM ‘community’ that seeks to redefine what a relationship is supposed to look like.
The “rules”. The “language”. All of it is so beyond laughable it makes me think these “Alpha” fucks are just all a bunch of sad pretenders. No real “Alpha male” needs a fucking community system to advise him on how to act towards his woman. Fucking period.
So earmuffs to you all, if your way of life is tied to the relentless nonsense that cycles its way through la Comunidad de la Ball Gags.
In short, I have a real problem with all this redefining the core of a relationship away from Love and Intimacy and Friendship to some twisted BDSM nonsense where “chores” and “rules” are the new foundation of the relationship.
Seriously, like how do you plan on raising kids one day or doing something as simple as paying bills if a flogger to the crotch is the mechanism to avoid those god damn late fees?
These “pseudo-relationships”, if that’s what they are, just stink of a whole bunch of sad people trying to find their way. And weakness is just a pathetic personality trait; I don’t care how ‘new age’ and ‘cool’ you fuck.
Nah. Fuck that and fuck those fuckers.
Falling in Love. The old-fashioned way. That’s what it’s all about. That’s what it’s always been all about. Where both people have a voice and you need to earn your respect and the moment you lose sight of appreciating the other one you deserve to be shown the door. These ‘make em suffer’ Doms and ‘I need to be treated like shit subs’ – not in bed – but in the relationship itself, are a just a sad bunch to watch.
Respect: that’s the right way to do it and that will never change. Sure the bedroom experience can be and should be whatever brings you closest to your loved one, so don’t think I am shitting on BDSM or DD/LG or D/s relationship – I’m not all. What I take issue with is the “redefining a relationship” nonsense. It just smells like some sad fuck who ran through all the 50 Shades books and decided to live some pretend existence. An actor in their own life.
Just the concept that there is a BDSM “community” gives me the fucking willies. Seriously? This shit is just for people trying to belong to something and it’s rather pathetic.
I mean, is there is a fee to join and do you get the monthly newsletter and come November they will advise you on how to vote or something? It’s all ridiculous. If I wanted to join a cult I’d become a Mormon and have seven different holes to fuck; one for each day of the week. Oops. I guess I just hurt someone’s feelings. And yes, seven is the right number for those keeping score. Oral and anal are strictly prohibited if you want to make it to the super heaven in your magic underwear.
Point is: You don’t need a fucking roadmap Mr. Wolf Dom and Miss Little Sub. Passion is all you need.
You should never lose sight of the magic that is Love and pure romance and respect and getting close to a person. Nothing in this world is purer and you can easily go and fuck it all up if you let some D/s rulebook tell you what to do. You should do what feels right. In your heart.
When some guy tells you that you can’t cum for two weeks, you might want to ask yourself, why. Maybe it’s all for fun and it’s perfectly OK. Or maybe he is just measuring himself against himself and using you as a tool to prove that he is a real man in some sad pathetic way.
You may recognize that I do not subscribe to any rulebook, let alone some traditional BDSM community ever-evolving horseshit. I have no desire whatsoever to make a woman I care about emotionally stressed and not feel pleasure. The world does enough of that for her as it is.
My take? Just grab your sexy bitch by the neck and let her know you want her and when you want to tie her up, torture her pussy, and force orgasms on her, just fucking do it and stop trying to be part of some modern-day Sodom and Gomorrah Book Club because it’s “cool” because you look like a fucking idiot for even trying.
You don’t need a fucking MeetUp group where everyone has black leather ass-less chaps on to have permission to be a sub or dom. Just do it already and stop trying to figure out the fucking proper formula. It’s inside you and it always has been there.
Mr. Dom Stud. You might want to focus on being a man, a father, developing a career, set down the XBox controls or turn off SportsCenter and grab your woman to make her weak in knees with a fucking kiss that instantly wets her pussy knowing this badass man is all about rocking her world.
And Miss Little, when you come back down from Planet Dumbass, and you will come back down, I assure you, don’t come knocking on my door. You think I wanna unwind that mental head case that has become you and your version what a relationship looks like? No fucking thanks.
When that time comes and you want the real “alpha”. The executive, dad-of-the-year, who fires orgasms at you like a fucking Marine Corps artillery? Keep the fucking binky at home. I don’t need another kid.
I’ll take a woman who handles her shit. Who gifts me her submission but makes me earn it. Who earns her keep and our bond is built on pure respect for one another as equals. These D/s rules that I am supposed to follow? Give me a fucking break.
Everyone has seen those posts circulate that explains how to treat your Little or how to be a proper Dom or Daddy or Kitten or whatever. Those are the blowhard idiots that I am talking about. Do what feels right in your heart and you will be fine.
And the words. Oh my god. My contempt for the rules surrounding the jargon is so thick you could drizzle it on pancakes. Anytime words get hardline definitions for anything, from politics to religion to BDSM, you should run the other way. Period.
In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with using any word in any language (Wolf, Kitten, Daddy, Little, etc), but when you tell me what the word is “supposed to mean,” and that I am using it wrong, I have three words that are clear as day and you don’t need a Ph.D. in Rope Bondage to figure it out: Go Fuck Yourself.
I’m sure a few might unfollow me because of this articulated contempt for the “new type of relationship” you are currently in and the BDSM community garbage as a whole. See the GIF above for my feelings on that.