AMA: What are some ways a Dom can help a sub get in sub mode in daily life if she is struggling to stay in sub mindset consistently
Well, I would suggest that you make sure that she wants to be in that mode first. I can’t say from what you told me if she is not being submissive or she doesn’t want to be, and she may have a good reason for not wanting to be.
In my experience, submissive women naturally ache to be in that state if they trust you, or they just like to get fucked hard, and are not really submissive outside of the bedroom. For me, I could never be totally fulfilled with a bedroom-only situation, but everyone is different and neither is right or wrong.
But, if you and she are looking to be in D/s relationship, first off, it is on you to be knowledgeable. You have to be a step ahead of her and take your role seriously. I suggest you start by reading: The Loving Dominant, by John Warren. Also, check out other blogs and forums, but I recommend forums outside of Tumblr. Any yahoo can say shit on Tumblr – not every person gets a platform on an actual website to talk about these things and you have to be careful if the person you are reading from on Tumblr is just a woman-hating sadist spouting hate.
For practical steps, I suggest:
- submissive journaling,
- tasks, and
- guidance when it is needed.
Ease into it – be honest with her – be open and vulnerable.
Good luck to you,